It seems everybody is look for love these days, just look at how many thousands of dating websites with millions of singles looking for love, or the hundreds of dating apps like Tinder, and many are cropping up every single day. Millions of singles are looking for that special someone, taken up with a wonder ‘Is there someone meant for Me!’.
If you happen to read dating profiles you’ll see almost all have a similar trend:- ‘Looking for someone smart, funny, loves to travel, and has a great sense of humor.’… In essence, they are looking for someone to make them happy.
Is it true that being in a relationship is going to bring happiness and bliss in your life?
If it were true, we wouldn’t have had such a huge exodus of Divorces today. Just look at these mind boggling divorce statistics.
More people are either divorcing or separating more than those getting married. If more are divorcing and separating, then being in a relationship probably is not the answer or solution to unhappiness as many commonly perceive.
OK. we’re not here to talk about Marriage neither divorce. Let’s save that for another time.
How To be Single and Happy
1. The Problem is Deeper than You Think
If you’re longing for a relationship to cure your unhappiness, then you might be disappointed in the long run because unhappiness is just a symptom of something deeper. Something deeper that a Boyfriend or a Girlfriend can’t fix.
It is true that one of the greatest needs for Humanity is “Love”. To love and to be loved. We are social beings. We don’t function well alone. Loneliness drives us to look for love, community, friendships, and relationships.
The companionship you’re craving for, can be got through surrounding yourself with great people who care about you. People you can build a sense of belonging and community with. A boyfriend or girlfriend cannot provide you with this kind of community or companionship. Only like minded people can.
2. Set Your Priorities Right
Priorities are very important and the more clearer you are in your priorities and goals, the better your life will be. Know what you want, Set up steps how to achieve those priorities. Know what is most important in your life and make a list from the most important to the least important and lastly, pursue those priorities.
Set everyday to work towards those priorities and don’t let anything distract you. In other words, ‘Be Focused’.
If your priorities are set right, your life is going to be satisfying even when you’re single. You have a rare opportunity of achieving your goals when you’re still single. Married people have a lot of responsibilities on their plate and this ‘sometimes’ can be a distraction. Use your time wisely while still single.
3. Surround Yourself with Positive People
When you surround yourself with positive people, you won’t have time to think of thoughts of loneliness and in return, You will live a happy life. I have found that the happiest people are those who surround themselves with positive people.
Positive people help you tap into their energy. They encourage you to dream big, and see the world in a new dimension. Such high energy makes you want to move mountains.
The more time you spend with positive people, the more satisfying your life will become.
Negative people on the other hand, suck the energy and all life out of you. They suck you dry to the point of developing stress, depression and feelings of loneliness. Avoid people who add no value into your life. I mean value in terms of energy and optimism. You rather have a small group of friends who are positive and optimistic than a big crowd who just pull and push you down.
4. Happiness is a Mind Set
There’s a big deception that happiness comes from owning or having things. The grass looks greener on the other side but don’t be fooled. The grass is always greener on the other side, until you jump the fence and see the weeds up close.
The thing is, Happiness is a result of your attitude, and your attitude is a mind set. You can choose to either be Happy or be Miserable. No one is going to make you happy, your boyfriend or girlfriend is not going to make you happy. Actually they can even make your life Miserable. You can be single and Happy or be single and miserable. You choose, You decide your fate.
Everyday you have to make a choice to be Happy, for no one is going to make that choice for you.
Always have a positive attitude no matter the situation.
Start each day with a declaration; “I choose this day to be Happy. I’m not going to give in to negativity, I’m not going to focus on my limitations, I’m not going to focus on the things I don’t have or things I can’t do.
Today I choose to focus on the good, on the beautiful, on the noble, on things propelling me towards my destiny. I choose to be Happy Today.”
Your attitude determines your altitude.
5. Believe in Yourself
Self belief is a very important key component to happiness. There is a common factor in people who are suffering with depression. They have very low self esteem. In such a situation, there’s a thinking that, you don’t matter or whatever you do will never stand up no matter how hard you try. Having thoughts of “no one loves me, cares about me, no one could ever love me, I’m ugly, useless, will never make it, etc”. You feel small inside, bitten, tired, and worthless.
Such demeaning confidence crushing thoughts are a lie and they are straight from the pit of hell. Why, because that’s not who you truly are.
For you’re wonderfully and fearfully made, You’re special, You’re unique, You’re beautiful, You’re handsome, You’re capable, and you’re truly amazing. Believe in yourself, always.
Be Happy, Smile.
I know you’ve enjoyed this post! Now it’s your turn. Share with us in the comment section your experience on how to be single and happy.